can only please one person per day.
Today is not your day.
Tomorrow isn't looking good either.
Lack of planning
on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.
This is not Burger King.
You don't get it your way.
You take it my way,
Or you don't get
the damn thing.
An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.
When in doubt, mumble.
When in trouble, delegate.
Someday you'll look back on all this and plow into a
Which way did they go?
How fast were they going?
How many of them were there?
I must find
I am their LEADER!
I don't have an attitude problem.
You have a perception problem.
If you don't
to do it right,
How will you find time
to do it over?
On the keyboard of life,
one finger on the escape key.
CLICK HERE for more motivation (NOT!) from Despair, Inc.!
What they say vs. what they mean (a guide to help-wanted ads)
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED TEAM"
We have no time
to train you.
"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"
We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well, a couple of the
real daring guys wear earrings.
"MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED"
You'll be six months behind schedule on your first
"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED"
Some time each night and some time each weekend.
"DUTIES WILL VARY"
in the office can boss you around.
Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).
"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE"
We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.
CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE"
You'll need it to replace three people who just left.
TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS"
You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.